12.20.2008

12.14.2008

A Point for Buefo

So, I was catching up on some news this evening and came across this story on Google News. Read it, liked it, felt satisfied I was up to date on a current event. Then, I saw this comment from "Buefo":

"Does anyone else find this to be an unfortunate choice of words for a headline? :D"

It took me a while to realize what Buefo meant, but then I realized I could totally hang out with him/her. To think that Obama went straight from balls to butthole!

Thought it might be funny to all of you too.

12.10.2008

For Pat and Adam

It's probably as close as you're gonna get...

12.08.2008

In honor of the namesake...

Some of these are dumb/don't make sense, and some are funny. Worth the time to peruse, however.

1. What's broing on?
2. brotocol
3. brogram
4. brotozoa
5. brotégé
6. bromance
7.brofessional
8. Alpha and the Bromega
9. Brotagonist
10. Brochure
11. Broko Brono
12. Four-leaf brover
13. A low brow
14. Brodeo
15. Brodo Baggins
16. Frosty the Broman
17. Chicken Bro-mein
18. Bromaine lettuce
19. Bro-rida
20. Cookie brough ice cream
21. Bro Bice
22. Bro-hawk
23. Bro Bro gadget copter
24. Bro Bro Power Rangers
25. Bro Bro Bro Your Boat
26. Rain Rain Bro Away
27. Just bro away.
28. Fucking brow (grow) up.
29. Bromeo and Juliet
30. Brotein (shake)
31. Brow up (throw up)
32. Bro and tell
33. Brolivia
34. Bromania
35. Brosta Rica
36. Brozambique
37. Broatia
38. Broland
39. São Bromé and Príncipe
40. The Broman Empire
41. Brovakia
42. Idabro
43. North/South Dabrota
44. Broklahoma
45. Brohio
46. New Mexibro
47. Minnebrota
48. Hubro Chavez
49. Fidel Casbro
50. Nicolas Sarbrozy
51. Brommander-in-Chief
52. Sine and Brosine
53. Bro. J. Simpson
54. Me and my bro-workers
55. Insurance bro-pay
56. Bro the lawn
57. Bro my gawd
58. atbrosphere
59. We shall brovercome
60. Ayatollah Bromeini
61. Broseidon, lord of the brocean
62. Brometheus
63. Broficiency
64. Brototype
65. Bro v. Wade (1973)
66. Brover Cleveland
67. Brosemite Sam
68. brolific
69. broverstatement
70. Bropensity
71. brotally
72. Standard Operating Brocedure
73. Brone Call
74. Bro money, Bro problems
75. bromentum
76. Marco Brolo
77. Brose-minded
78. Brose/Broetry
79. Bromar Garcia-Parra
80. David Browie
81. Kurt Brobain
82. Saxobrone
83. Deal or Bro Deal
84. Bros and Cons
85. Wake me up before you bro-bro
86. Bronely
87. Times New Broman
88. Fuck the Brolice
89. Snorting Brocaine
90. Brotalitarian
91. Brotisserie
92. Broverfield
93. Bronan the Barbarian
94. Brosef Stalin
95. Dunkin Bronuts
96. Bro Biden
97. Brolitically incorrect
98. Bronas Brothers
99. Your average Joe Bro
100. Brocahontas
101. Brolka Dots
102. Walk, instead of taking the broey
103. Broverreach
104. Political Brotest
105. Villabrova
106. Brote or Die
107. Brovocation
108. Brocational School
109. Facebook Brofile
110. You just got browned
111. A big broner
112. Electrons and brotons
113. My favorite band: Bro-town
114. Bro-motion
115. Suntan Brotion
116. Barack Brobama
117. Ian Smith, leader of the former Brodesia
118. Russia's conflict with South Brossetia
119. Brojan Horse
120. Brhode Island
121. A Broad Block on the road
122. Brolio Vaccine
123. Bromona College
124. Job Bromotion
125. Nebroleon Bronaparte
126. BeBrolite
127. Brobot
128. Swiss Yodel/Brodel
129. Jim Bro Laws
130. Edgar Allen Broe
131. Academic Brovation
132. Brospective
133. You made her broan
134. Brome Improvement
135. When in Brome...
136. Brokémon
137. Only for a broment, and the broment's gone
138. My Heart Will Bro On
139. No way Brosé
140. They tried to make me go to rehab, but I said bro, bro, bro
141. Broasted chicken
142. Broller Skates
143. Brotractor
144. Brokyo, Japan
145. Math Brolutions Manuel
146. The Brotocols of the Elders of Zion
147. Uno, Bros, Tres
148. Hulk Brogan
149. Bronus Points
150. Vincent Van Bro

Taken from a posting on this dude's myspace page.

12.02.2008

Six Word Stories

I think most of you know about the Hemmingway bet that he could write a story with just six words (he won with something like "for sale, baby shoes, never worn") - but I came across this old article from Wired magazine that had a variety of other authors write some 6 word stories.

Some are pretty funny....

This one from Margaret Atwood is pretty funny:

Longed for him. Got him. Shit.

11.22.2008

Misters Magoo and Lieberman

So, I promised Adam I would post this video explanation of why I like to refer to Lieberman as "Magoo." Let's begin with a brilliant illustration from Jon Stewart (in both vocal mimicry and content):



Now, compare that to a clip from a Mr. Magoo cartoon. You really only have to watch as much as you need to see the comparison. (I watched the whole thing, though, because I just can't get enough Mr. Magoo.)



I rest my case.

11.21.2008

What?!

From the NYTimes.

I'm investing my money in a Delorean (and a Doc Brown) right not.

11.20.2008

Did Obama seal the election 85 million years ago?

Maybe. This story is unbelievable. Turns out the late cretaceous period had lot to do with Obama winning North Carolina.

The Brolatollahs Geography Bee

Go here to play the game. Name as many countries as you can in five minutes, then post your score in the comments. Winner gets an HJ from Paddy.

11.18.2008

I love this picture

That's Extreme!!

An article/video on BBC of dudes kayaking down a 300 foot spillway at a dam, seen above. Makes me want to drink lots of Mt. Dew and give high fives.

11.17.2008

Two Reasons to Watch

So, the most recent Family Guy is the funniest one I've seen in a while, and I thought I would offer you all a little encouragement to watch (if you haven't already). Here are two reasons, one funny, one shocking (and funny):





Hope you all enjoy.

11.16.2008

Scary Runways

Found this on CNN. It's pretty sweet. Check out slide 2. It involves low planes and a beach. F'in' nuts.

11.14.2008

Creighton and Nebraska make the national news. Any news is good news, right?

By the way, I would never abandon Grawlix. I love him too much. (Sweet, Love Week.)

11.09.2008

A New Day

Roy Helu puts an exclamation point on Hate Week 2008

So ends Hate Week. That was fun. Paddy has proposed a "Love Week" to cleanse our emotional palates. I'll let him explain what that means.

Go Big Red.

11.06.2008

Looking for a gig?

Want to work in the Obama administration? Go here to fill out an application.

Be forewarned, though:

Some positions will require Senate confirmation while others will not.

Who wants to be Secretary of Defense?

(Kathleen Sebelius is hoping for an appointment to the Cabinet just to get the hell out of Kansas.)

Mmmmmmm...

I think I posted about this before, but now I have a recipe....

11.05.2008

News Surfacing about McCain/Palin Problems

A Fox reporter says here that Palin didn't know africa is a continent. Apparently she couldn't name the countries of NAFTA either.

I heard KU doesn't think that Ndamukong Suh is a continent. But he is and he will eat Todd Reesing and Mangino.

Two Things I've been thinking about...

1. Young children and those born after last night will never know of a time when the US Presidency did not include an African-American. I can't wait to see how this improves race relations by the time those generations grow up. Truly a bright future.

2. One thing we learned at the very same time an African-American was marking his victory is that there is still a lot of discrimination present in our country. At least three states, including CA, supported propositions to withdraw rights from gay couples--that is, rights to adopt or marry. This is certainly a future hurdle to overcome.

(And maybe a third: 3. That although Lancaster Country, NE voted for Obama they are still going to have a tough weekend dealing with their football team's loss!)

11.04.2008

Dancing Robots Will Rule Us All

I, for one, welcome our new Lou Bega-dancing robot overlords.



They're going to take over the Earth. Except Kansas. They'll want nothing to do with that Josh-hole.

11.03.2008

"Women Germier Than Men, Study Finds"

The "Cootie Question" was apparently not explored in this study and remains open to question. I still think they have them.

This. Fucking. Election

A pretty cool visual representation of the last 18-24 months.

The last couple lines should read "Obama 326, McCain 212. Nebraska 45, KU 3."

Hate Week: A Proposal

Gentlemen. This Saturday, the Nebraska Cornhuskers will meet the Kansas Jayhawks on the gridiron. Given that 3/5ths of our contributors hail from the Land of Osborne and the other two have been or are affiliated with KU, this cannot go unmentioned.

Hence, here is my proposal. In the interest of blinding tribal allegiances, I propose the next six days constitute "Hate Week 2008." What does that mean? Every post must reference the upcoming conflict in some way. For example, J's recent post entitled "Don't be stupid when you use Facebook" could end with some comment about how if you live in Nebraska and use Facebook stupidly, you might lose your job at the cow-rape factory. Similarly, my recent post, "What was it Emerson said?" could have ended with a comment about Kansas being the home of little minds and MASSIVE waist-bands. This is Hate Week.

That's my proposal. It is so moved. Anyone to second?

Yes, Baby Mangino?
Gurgle. Gurgle. Glagdemmm. SECOND! Gurgle.

Moved and seconded. All in favor of "Hate Week"?

10.31.2008

Zack and Miri Make a Porno

The last line of A.O. Scott's review of the film:

"The gauzy sweetness that envelops the end of the movie is not unwelcome, but not very convincing either. The 'porno' remains unfinished, and so does 'Zack and Miri,' having — like most pornography, interestingly enough — thrown away an imaginative premise to get down to predictable, mechanical business. It’s as if Mr. Smith were a plumber who knocked at your door and then, against all reasonable expectations, insisted on fixing the sink."

Awesome.

10.29.2008

What was it Emerson said?


"Consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds."

10.23.2008

10.22.2008

New Lil' O'Reilly Video

Here

[from jibjab.com]

10.21.2008

Ah...How I Miss High School.....

I give them a 10 on creativity.

10.19.2008

New Video

In response to Grawlix's post about Mark Wahlberg.

10.17.2008

Obama is a Gangsta

AY, at New Year's you and I had a conversation about the ethics of hip-hop. I think Obama (starting at about 2:19) condenses my position pretty well. "Art can't just be a rear-view mirror, it should have a headlight out there pointing where we need to go."

Also. he brushed off them haters in the primary:

Buffet on what to do with your money

I think I have a crush on him.

10.16.2008

If you need it...

Injuries Resulting from Car Surfing

(Some people at the CDC might have too much time on their hands.)

10.15.2008

Questions of Racial Discrimination at UNL College of Law

The group Center for Equal Opportunity did a study of admissions at UNL's College of Law and found that the college is discriminating against white applicants and favoring Hispanic and black applicants. Basically the group looks at undergraduate grade point averages and LSAT scores - and compares and contrasts the various racial groups. The study can be found here.

The dean of the law college responded in this letter.

This all comes as Nebraska approaches a vote on Initiative 424 which aims to end gender and racial preferences.

I must admit that my first reaction is to side with the college on this - I have faith in the admission process and that it is done with a general good faith effort. But I also read the CEO's report (which is obviously designed to support anti-affirmative action) which seemed valid on at least some levels.

I know you all are fairly savvy when it comes to political issues and we don't talk much about affirmative action or gender or racial preferences - so I thought I'd throw this out there for discussion. Also, I know that some of you are better at statistical analysis than I am and was wondering if you could attest to the report's statistical findings.

Thanks for looking this over and adding your thoughts.

10.14.2008

My Love for You is like Diarrhea, it Flows like a River

BBC article about the sale of a book of text messages for lovers to send to each other. The highlight is the title of this post, but others are a bit more creepy, including one promising HIV:

"H is for Happiness and joy forever with an I: Incomparable love that will never V: Vanish until death do us part. I love you," the message concludes. I'm not sure I'd be looking to carry on a relationship with someone who sends a message like this...

A more appropriate cultural spin-off:

"You're the only mosquito in my net."

10.13.2008

Does Barack Obama read Brolatollahs?

How else do you explain this?


I got a theory.

Mark Wahlberg Offers His Ruling

Mr. Wahlberg (sans the Funky Bunch) does not think the SNL sketch I offered for debate was all that funny. He plays the "SNL used to be way funnier" card.

His point might be valid... if dude hadn't made a movie (the worst by one of Paddy's favorite directors) in which he talks to a plastic tree:


Also, he's responsible for Entourage, which makes me want to smother a handicapped baby.

Worst. Halloween Costume. Ever.

I'm open to being proven wrong with other examples.

10.12.2008

Boos and Thumbs Down



If this were a gladiatorial contest, well...I think you can get the picture.

10.11.2008

An Interesting Video

CNN video

A little glimpse of the McCain I like. I think this speaks a great deal to his character--that he was willing to say this in front of so many, apparently uncivilized, attendees. This is the part of McCain that I admire and respect; the part that we used to see much more of.

However, I also think this behavior is the natural outgrowth of the negative campaigning and the poor models of "debate" that we get from both candidates and the media. It's all about the ad hominens, and never about the issues. The sincere fear that leads these people to ask these questions and make these statements is the result of the very tactics the McCain campaign has been using. It's good that McCain is trying to assuage the fears, but it is a little too late, I think.

10.09.2008

Salute it before you eat it

and you will eat it, America.

10.06.2008

Can I get a ruling?

Funny or not funny?

10.04.2008

10.03.2008

Porn and Adultery

An very thought-provoking article from The Atlantic.

Your thoughts?

Things I Liked Today:

(1) A funny video about voter registration and voting (especially Jonah Hill, from Superbad, and Sarah Silverman).

(2) The NYTimes interactive transcript of the VP debate. It is here where I searched for the term "also" (having noticed that Palin LOVES this word--it's like the Alaskan version of the valley-girl "like"). The results: Biden used the term 3 times, Gwen Ifill, 2, and Palin...47! Wow.

(3) How ridiculous CNN correspondent Leslie Sanchez is. She gave Joe Biden a B on CNN's interactive VP debate report card, saying he was "too verbose and technical when explaining the Obama/Biden progressive ticket." (I thought that has been the criticism of Obama all along--that he has been too general about his policies. Now that Biden works to clarify them through specifics, he's being too detailed. Honestly, Sanchez spins the shit out of these things. My question: Is it really worth having contributors like this from either end of the spectrum? All they do is make stuff up anyway.) To add insult to injury, Sanchez gave Palin an A, arguing "she spoke about common sense reform on domestic issues. She reinvigorated the GOP ticket." I didn't here a specific idea from her in the whole 90 minute debate. Of course, that's just me.

(4) And this story, about a kid who thought it would be a great idea to send a porn pic to his ENTIRE school.

10.02.2008

Warren Buffet on Taxation



Apparently Buffet has been making this argument for a while now, but I just caught it for the first time today when he was speaking at a conference sponsored by Fortune magazine. The gist of it is this (and this will be brief because I'm by no means a tax specialist): Considering multiple forms of taxation (payroll and income [I'm not really sure where captial gains taxes fit in here, but the fact that Buffet isn't too concerned about it makes me think it is not that substantial]), Buffet pays a smaller percentage in taxes each year than his secretary or cleaning staff. He cites specific numbers in the video: his rate, around 17%, his secretary, around 32%.

Now, Buffett is the third richest man in the world, with an estimated net worth of somewhere around $50 billion. I don't see him as some saint who stands out among his peers--he admittedly likes to make money, to play the market, etc. But, he sees the inequality in the tax system and addresses it. It's not that I see him saying that the rich should have an unfair burden, but simply that as it stands now, the non-rich (meaning 95% of the US population) are on the unfair end of the system. Something is certainly wrong here.

I just started thinking about this a lot because many of my students have been into talking about this. I gave them a list of ethical dilemmas to work with in class one day (as a way to formulate arguments) and one of them dealt with the issue of welfare. It is amazing to me how many of them say (putting themselves in the position of a career man or woman), "Hey, it's my money, I earned it, so why should I have to give it to someone else?" I often pose the questions to them: How much is enough? Or, how much is too much? The answer is often not one at all. The concern, in my mind, is that these students (and I'm sure a lot of adults too) see their potential as endless--that is, to say, that if they earn it (through hard work of course), then it will never border on an immoral hording of money. They hesitate to see that at some point it just cannot be useful to keep so much money.

Long story short, I think Buffet notices this and recognizes that sparing a little more in taxes out of his billion-dollar nestegg will NOT affect him--not even a little bit, not at all. The bloggers from Freakonomics did a similar experiment (as they are self-admittedly not on the Buffet plane) and came up with similar results. They, too, pay a much smaller percentage in taxes, and don't seem to see a leveling of the taxing-field as an undue burden.

As I watched some clips of the Presidential and Vice-Presidential debates tonight, I began to wonder why people still buy the Conservative "trickle down" theory. Every election people go to the polls and vote against their very own interests--they choose the candidates that spin the issue with rhetoric that says raising taxes on the top 1% will result in higher payroll taxes, which in turn, will lead to job loss and lower wages. It's just not true. Buffet is not concerned about keeping his employees (he's even drawing their attention to how much he saves compared to them!) or paying higher payroll taxes, and he heads one of the most successful company in the country.

Why do people resist seeing this? Why is a policy of tax breaks for the middle class such a hard one to sell when most of the country falls into that category? In short, WTF? Damn, I'm pissed about this!

Is Postmodernism American?

That's one aspect of Max Fisher's response to the comments Paddy directed us to earlier. He argues that the Nobel folk don't dislike America as much as they dislike postmodernism, and this mode has come to dominate American literature over the last thirty-some years. He points to non-American postmodernists who would be well ahead of any Americans in the Nobel pecking order - Rushdie and Eco, for example - who have similarly been overlooked. Postmodernism's general skepticism with regard to politics and idealism make its texts unattractive to a highly political body like the Nobel committee. (one could easily substitute Joyce or Nabokov in for postmodernism, I think)

So perhaps the real question should not be "Why does the Nobel committee hate America?" but "Why does the Nobel committee hate the last forty years?"

Post of the Month

I like Grawlix's idea of a post of the month. Can we submit nominations for a travelling monthly prize?

Fine. I'll go get a gun that DOES work.

This link is to a story about a dude who comes home from the bar with his girlfriend and wants to have business time. She refuses. He gets a gun and starts shooting himself. "He then stumbled into the kitchen and knocked himself unconscious."

Ha. Wish I had that on video tape...

Papa Bear, the early years

Question: funny YouTube video or the funniest YouTube video?

In Case You Need It

link

This Looks Awesome

Grawlix, I especially expect you to be into this.

10.01.2008

Sneezing

Just sneezed during my federal indian law class - someone said "bless you." And i thought how weird it is we do this - and I wondered what other cultures do when someone sneezes.

I looked it up - my favorite is what the french say in response:

In French polite speech, after the first sneeze, one says à vos souhaits which means "to your desires". If the same person sneezes again, the second response is à vos amours, which means "to your loves." Santé (health) is a more casual response.

You can look up your favorite here.

Christmas (and Halloween, apparently) Comes Early with this Gem

When this woman was arrested for peeing on a neighbor's porch, blocking traffic, and terrorizing children,

"The arresting officer says Allen smelled of alcohol, slurred her speech, and was belligerent. She also allegedly cussed at the officer."

Kudos to you, ma'am.


Full details in this link.
Michelle Allen Will Dress As A Cow, Pee On Your Porch And Give You The Best Mug Shot Ever

All About Palin

Just watch how absurd Bay Buchanan's defense of Palin sounds. (She was also part of Romney's campaign, which makes me sick.) Honestly, you think you would just get tired of spinning the facts so much.

Carville takes her to town at the end with a sweet comment about "facts."

A Gift for the Politically Active

I thought this was a pretty sweet idea.

Re: J's Cloud Trap

NYU Abroad

Also Interesting. Thought we might have a good conversation about the exportation of knowledge, its potential strengths and weaknesses, etc.

9.30.2008

Nobel Snub

Now, I know that the US has "lost its standing in the world" and all, but this is fairly preposterous. Europe may have its great writers (and I'm sure it does), but I hardly think that their existence and productivity negates the potential for great writers in the United States (and for writers in the rest of the world, for that matter). Even if there are no potential US candidates for the prize this year, the statement is uncalled for and below someone holding this position. I think US writers and the literature they have produced has proven itself worthy of admiration and study--at least, I (selfishly) hope so.

It's still a great prize, and those who receive it should be honored, but it my opinion literature is about so much more than this, especially snide comments from judges.

The best line from the article: "You would think that the permanent secretary of an academy that pretends to wisdom but has historically overlooked Proust, Joyce, and Nabokov, to name just a few non-Nobelists, would spare us the categorical lectures," said David Remnick, editor of The New Yorker.

What do others think?

I love this city. Part II.

What this time? The ObamaBurger. It's got bacon (no Muslim would eat that), "Michelle-fist-pumped caramelized onions," and is served on multi-racial marble rye.

If you think I'm not going to go eat one of these this weekend, you are sadly mistaken.

Russian Rihanna

I fully admit this is one of the weirdest things I've ever seen. But dude breaks that shit DOWN at the 2:08 mark!

I don't know why...

...but this seemed like it belonged on this blog.

THE CLOUD IS A TRAP!!!

This guy looks like you, Grawlix.

For Paddy

There may be hope for us yet. Although I'm not going to start holding my breath just yet.

Why the bailout vote failed.

I heard somebody on MSNBC say it was because the vote took place so fast that the whips of both parties didn't actually count the votes of their own party. So, there was confusion over who was actually supposed to vote for the bill and who was "allowed" to vote against it.

As this commentator noted (I'm too lazy to try and find video of this), typically the party whip makes sure that they have enough votes to pass (or reject, whatever the case may be) the bill, then releases those who want to vote against it--typically for political posturing--to vote as they please. This is why a huge amount of "nay" votes come in on a bill almost immediately after the necessary votes to pass have been cast. It was also noted that most of the Congressmen who voted against the bill are facing tough re-election campaigns (although I would like to see actual figures on this, but, again, I'm too lazy). Voting against this bill would allow them to say to their constituents that they don't bow down to Wall Street or Washington. And, if you're a Republican, you could even play it as being a "maverick."

Regardless, it really seems like the bill failed because of politics, not because people actually thought it was a bad deal. Unfortunately, we are never really told why something like this fails. 1) Politicians don't want people to see the petty games they play. 2) Most Americans could care less how Congress actually works, which is really sad. I was glad to see somebody in the media making an honest attempt to parse out exactly why the vote failed.

9.29.2008

Family Guy Season Premiere

One of the best family guy episodes yet, especially the Cyrano part (and NO I'm not an anti-Semite).

I love this city.

Only in Chicago would a bar have a nude portrait of Sarah Palin painted on the wall (nsfw-ish). Note I said painted on the wall, not hung on the wall. Awesome.

How long before Palin is forced to withdraw?

I thought Tina Fey's most recent portrayal of Palin was a huge exaggeration, but this opinion piece in Newsweek, with quotes from the Couric interview, made me realize how much trouble Palin really is in. Who wants to put some money down on whether or not she has to withdraw before the election?

It Takes a Removal from Office

Since they left office, President Clinton and Al Gore have gone on to do great things. The former started the Clinton Global Initiative to fight AIDS in Africa, and the latter raised awareness of global warning. President Carter (although some may think he's lost it) has continued his work outside of political office to find a solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. These are just a few examples (and I'm sure there are many more), but my point here is that these cases evidence the fact that politics get in the way of getting real things done--meaningful things that affect peoples' lives.

I think of this because today in the NYTimes, there is an article about how Ehud Olmert, the outgoing Prime Minister of Israel, said in an interview that Israel needs to withdraw from most (if not all) of its West Bank settlements and stop posturing toward an international conflict with Iran. These are striking comments coming from the leader of Israel, comments that need to be said but, unfortunately, are only said as he is leaving office under the suspicion of government corruption. It seems as though Israeli (and international) politics have limited his ability to say this before, and again, have stood in the way of meaningful change.

(The Times article gives a brief statement from the opposition: "Avigdor Lieberman, who heads the Yisrael Beiteinu party, said on the radio that Mr. Olmert was 'endangering the existence of the State of Israel irresponsibly' [and that] "those who thought Israel’s problem was a lack of defined borders — as Mr. Olmert stated in the interview — 'are ignoramuses who don’t understand anything and they invite war.'" Just thought this was interesting because it clearly defines how unproductive these politics can be.)

9.28.2008

Farting

Places you should never fart:

1. Elevator - this is probably the most important of all the places. You should never do this...unless you are only going down one flight or up one flight. Otherwise just don't do it - someone is bound to get on.

2. The Shower - unlike the elevator - there is no need to worry about offending others. But somehow the hot water makes it all that much worse.

3. Immediately proceeding a b.m. - I found out first hand how horrible this was the other day - if you are standing over the toilet (undoing a belt or something) about to drop a deuce, don't let one go...when you sit down, it will be all around you.

4. Church - Greg set a record for this once and I couldn't stop from laughing during the whole mass.


Places where you should always fart:

1. The Bath Tub - not that we take baths ever - but seeing the bubbles rise while you are stewing in your own juices is tremendous.

2. Riding in the car with your friends.

3. When preparing a dutch oven for your significant other.

9.26.2008

How to Land a 747.

A checklist. You know, just in case.

I think McCain may have screwed himself

Everything I know about politics I learned from the West Wing. Suspending your campaign with 40 days left was never exactly covered by Bartlet. (Maybe it was. I'm only on Season 5 because the economic turmoil has frozen all of my liquid assets and I have been unable to raise capital to purchase the rest of the DVDs.) But, from what I understand about politics, it looks really bad to say you're not going to show up to the debate so you can deal with a crisis and then have everything completely backfire on you. It seemed like McCain's gamble had the possibility of paying off yesterday, but has ultimately bit him in the ass. Will the polls next week say to stick a fork in him? (Not to murder him, but because he's "done.")

Priapism

This is what they do when that magical little blue pill works too well.

Was Paulson really down on bended knee?!

This stuff is bananas.

9.25.2008

The Best Article I've Read About What To Do Now

Buffet was on CNBC yesterday and said some very interesting things. But this op-ed from the WSJ is the first thing I've read that provides some concrete guidance based on lessons learned in the past.

9.24.2008

How to Make an Amazing Music Video

...in three easy steps.

1) Have people you know do everyday things (smoke a cigarette, drink some water, talk on a cell phone) in front of a black background.
2) Put on a boxing glove and punch your friends in their respective faces. Do this really hard.
3) Record everything in super-slow-motion (1000+fps).

Now just add your generic dance rock track and enjoy your masterpiece.

This is Out of the Blue

Yesterday Chrysler Motors unveiled three battery-powered cars. They're slated to be on the market in 2010, to coincide w/ the Chevy Volt. The Wrangler and the Town and Country have similar ranges to the Volt, with 40 miles on battery, then an additional 360 miles from one-liter gasoline generator.

A surprise move for a firm steeped in bankruptcy or merger talks a few years ago, and an encouraging one, given the present oil situation.

On the silence of the vehicles: "That silence," one onlooker commented, "is the sound of the death of gasoline power." Overly optimistic?

9.23.2008

America the Gift Shop

If American foreign policy had a gift shop, what would it sell? Phillip Toledano developed an installation art project to answer that question. My favorite is the Abu Ghraib bobble-head.

This Is Amazing

I wonder how accurate this really is. Regardless, this is amazing. When I worked at MIT we were using PDAs and wireless sensors to capture data similar to this. I wonder if those guys are working with the iPhone now.


iPhone App - Heart Monitor from John Ballinger on Vimeo.

Duh

The researchers found that the number of Facebook friends and wallposts that individuals have on their profile pages correlates with narcissism. Buffardi said this is consistent with how narcissists behave in the real-world, with numerous yet shallow relationships. Narcissists are also more likely to choose glamorous, self-promoting pictures for their main profile photos, she said, while others are more likely to use snapshots.
[link]

The Problem With Android...

[link]

I'll cut you off before you can even get there--yes, this is posted on an iPhone blog, so it's certainly biased. The larger point is that "openness" isn't a free lunch.

9.19.2008

Google Phone

Just for you, my little iPhone hater.

The US Free-Market Economy?

An interview with Ron Paul on CNN today, in which he discusses the problems with the recent government bailouts of US corporations.



I really just wanted to hear some thoughts on this. I tend to agree with the idea that, while painful, these bankruptcies are responses of the market which (in a completely free-market economy) need to be allowed to occur. Ultimately, if there is no threat of bankruptcy (or oversight) it would seem that these businesses would also not be threatened by the dangers of speculation. I don't know everything about the US economy, but Paul's analogy of the drug addict's "fix" seems appropriate. There is no doubt that these current conditions are painful for many people, but what is the long-term cost of simply putting a bandaid on the situation? Is this just simply prolonging the inevitable?

That Ain't Right

Watch this Belgian sex ed PSA. Watch the whole thing. WATCH IT!


Indigenous Response to Palin?

An instructor of mine (she probably wouldn't want her name connected to this blog, otherwise I would cite my source more explicitly here), raised an interesting point the other night during a break in our class. She was discussing how indigenous peoples, particularly those of Arizona and Alaska, seem to be more or less ignored on important political issues. Her argument, as well as those of others, is that they, perhaps, have unique perspectives on how our candidates treat American citizens. Amidst all of the debate about character and policy positions, these voices do seem non-existent in popular coverage of the campaigns.

Some links to very interesting blogs that share these perspectives are here, here, and here.

This has been, of course, the status quo and certainly not suggestive that one party's treatment has been better than another. I'm assuming both parties and most Administrations have been pretty neglectful since the American frontier was "settled," along with the natives that lived there first.

Just some thoughts, but pass this along to others if you feel like it is important. It seems to me as though it is. (Note: I can't attest to everything on these pages, but I think that if you are interested enough, you can check the credibility of all claims. Here is one such site that seems to defend some of the Dineh-Navajo claims.)

9.17.2008

Picture Perfect

Too much to say about this photo. A perfect hybrid of your stereotypical Raiders fan (Black Hole residents) and their owner. He looks like one of those guys from Lord of the Rings. Do you think they asked him to strike this pose, and then moved around the room finding just the right angle to make it look like he has only one eye?

Note the difference in beverages, as well. Lane Kiffin? Water. Al Davis? No doubt a glass full of Jack with some Coke for color.



image- ESPN.com


9.16.2008

Homemade Electrical Vagina


The ultimate "why didn't I think of that" moment.

Hilarious And Sad

...all at the same time.

Obama and McCain Health Care Plans

So I just read this op ed piece from Bob Herbert in the nytimes. It explained how McCain's plan for the health care system will eventually kill everyone (more or less). But the piece references a journal, Health Affairs, which recently had two short studies done on Obama and McCain's plans. I tried to read them but it didn't work out. Anyone want to take the time to explain to me the pros and cons of the two systems? (Josh, I'm looking at you) Or would you post a more straightforward explanation or link?

Make-Out Party!!

Is your employer, a Wall Street institution, declaring bankruptcy? Are you facing an uncertain future? How can you deal? Grab a friend and go to town on CNN!

The fun starts about 45-seconds in.

9.15.2008

Today in Hilarious Literalism

Pie chart.

The Sweetest Video Ever



It's labeled as a Palin video, but it's an Obama (or anti-Obama?) thing.

Does this up Marquette's street cred?


20 year old Marquette girl stabs two other 20 year olds...

Insert age-old adage "Police suspect alcohol may have been a factor," here.

9.14.2008

More Great Stuff From Stewart

158-Year-Old Investment Bank Falls

An good article about Lehman Brothers and its probable bankruptcy. This shit could definitely be getting worse.

How did this all happen again? Really, no one saw this coming?

Change?

Obama has now been called a racist, a misogynist (or sexist), and an ageist (here, and here). These examples are just some of the hundreds of times I have heard these claims recently (and really throughout this long 2 year process).

If I weren't already disillusioned by politics, now would be the time. Really, I don't know what is more disappointing: (1) that news stations even cover this NONSENSE, (2) that people actually believe it, or (3) that politicians think that this is a decent way to win elections. I'm not, by any means, saying that these things (racism, and all the -isms you can think of) don't exist; I'm simply saying that they are only used as distractions in these campaigns. I personally don't think either Obama or McCain are -ists of any sort. I think they're both great guys. The thing that makes the difference for me is where they stand on the issues. Unfortunately, we don't seem to get anywhere near this terrain anymore because the candidates are always defending themselves against personal attacks.

In hearing that Obama had the best month for donations in August (with around $66 million receieved, with at least half a million new donors), I began to wonder whether I should be excited about this or not. I mean $66 million will buy a lot of publicity and pay a lot of workers, but I began to ask myself: Will it be paying for the same personal attack crap that we have been seeing for the past several months? I really hope that Obama's "change" starts now with some campaigning that rises above the useless (an utterly inane) brand that American has been privy to for the last decade. If not, that is a lot of money to spend on ads that attack one person, and continue to derail the focus on issues that affect a lot of people. (In fact, that money could probably go to a lot of people that really need it).

My proposal: Prohibit presidential campaigning to no more than six months before election day. This should be enough time to vet candidates through the primary process, have some small conventions, and a couple of debates before the big day, and not so long that millions of dollars are wasted on coming up with shit to talk about and throw at each other's opponents.

Know What Videos Always Make Me Laugh?

Ones of dudes in furry suits welcoming a hurricane to shore on national TV.

Mario Videos Always Make Me Laugh



My favorite part is when Mario describes the "gold star" effect.

9.11.2008

Feminism or disgrace?

Howard Stern is helping a girl from San Diego auction off her virginity to pay for her education. Girl's got a degree in women's studies and argues this is an act of feminist "empowerment."

I don't know what I think, other than I'm shocked there are virgin women's studies majors.

J Isn't the Only One Who Reads the Alumni Newsletter



Some of you have been to Creighton more recently than I have, but how much do you know about the new Harper Center? This place is bonkers. Especially the boardroom (pictured).

And does Creighton really need two fitness centers?

Go Jays!!

Creighton reaches No. 2 in men's soccer...bitches.

Yeah, I read the alumni newsletter, so what?

Of Course It Will Be

Dubai, you're still in the middle of a desert...and I think you may be showing your insecurity.

9.10.2008

Good Sign or Bad Sign

Would this be good signal for your special lady or a huge red flag?

Good Argument to Vote Obama

Makes it for libertarians, but I think the arguments can be plainly applied to any political philosophy.

I Should Have Majored In Economics

Interesting short piece on labor wages in China.

9.09.2008

For Pat and Josh

Pat and Josh - go get a wet cloth before you read this......just so you can clean up afterwards.

When is the economic pain going to stop?!

99 Cent Stores in Cali Hit Hard

Troglodytes

"Troglodytes" is my new favorite word...mostly because it reminds me of "Trogdor" from Strong Bad.

From the good people at Merriam-Webster:

troglodytes

Pronunciation:
\ˈträ-glə-ˌdīt\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
Latin troglodytae, plural, from Greek trōglodytai, from trōglē hole, cave (akin to Greek trōgein to gnaw, Armenian aracem I lead to pasture, graze) + dyein to enter
Date:
1555
1 : a member of any of various peoples (as in antiquity) who lived or were reputed to live chiefly in caves2 : a person characterized by reclusive habits or outmoded or reactionary attitudes
— trog·lo·dyt·ic  \ˌträ-glə-ˈdi-tik\ adjective


Large Hadron Collidor turned on Tomorrow

The Large Hadron Collidor gets turned on tomorrow, deep underground on the border of Switzerland and France. Scientists think it might lead to the discovery of the theoretical God Particle, but Steven Hawking says "Not so fast, bitches."

Despite the optimism, outrageous doomsday predictions make this experiment seem like the worst thing since the North American Union.

Secret Operations in Iraq

What do you guys think of this article? For some reason, either the tenor of the article, Woodward's smug silence, or the content itself makes me uncomfortable. Just wondering.

9.05.2008

Nerdy Songs

Had to post this, mainly for the shout-out to "public health."

Why weren't we ever this creative?

9.03.2008

Dudes, Palin just said she was going to "lay more pipeline." She's like the head of the national pipelayers union. Sweet. I have a new pick.

I just found...

the perfect t-shirt for Paddy and me.

I'm a MAN!!

So over those Sesame Street Band-Aids...

9.02.2008

This looks awesome!!



If I was in France, I would definitely check this out.

Related article here.

Video from latimes.com

Big-Ups to Grawlix

Let me just quickly congratulate Grawlix for his trip to Nebraska this past weekend. Without prior knowledge of said antics, without provocation, without inhibition, he opened the door to Adam's air-conditioning unit, prompting a tirade from Adam himself:

"WHO THE FUCK TOLD YOU DO TO THAT?"

Ha. Well done, sir. That activity is fast becoming my favorite pastime.

How Exciting is This?

Politics aside, EVERYONE should be able to admit one thing: that the Republican show just ain't goin' to be as good as the one the Democrats put on. I mean the Democrats mixed soap opera with historic speeches, tears with passionate zeal. Between the Clintons, the celebrity of Al Gore (although his speech didn't really go over all that well), and the man, the myth, the legend, Barack Obama (and his 70,000+ screaming supporters), the DNC was really, at its core, great television. So, what, you may ask yourself, will the Republicans do to respond? Tonight their program will include speeches by President Bush (via satellite), Fred Thompson, and Joe Lieberman. Honestly? That's the best they could do? Not ONE of these men is interesting (although, as an aside, I do give credit to the Bush adminstration in the recent days for their support of evacuees). Most likely, Bush will fumble over himself and not really get anyone excited about McCain. McCain lucked out when they had to cancel Monday's plan to have GW speak, so why ask again when it could potentially harm an appeal to independent voters? Thompson will probably....uh...what?...sorry, I fell asleep just thinking about him speaking. And Lieberman will be the same magoo he always is, except this time he will be wearing his Republican pants instead of his Democratic (or Independent) ones.

My point, simply, is that the Republicans NEED to put on a better show than this. Is this really going to captivate people? People watched the DNC because it was exciting, not only because they may have been interested in the policies. What are the chances that people are going to watch the RNC simply because of the policies? That is really all they have left after a program scheduled like this.

8.29.2008

Top 5 Doctor Myths

I'm linking to this not so much because of the subject, but more for the excellent vulgarity. My favorite line is at the end of #3.

8.28.2008

Where Do I Swipe?

Just what I want: some company storing my sexual history, so everyone knows how little action I get!



I just don't think this is going to catch on. The people who have sex will stick to safe sex and asking their partners, the people that don't aren't going to be swayed by some card saying that it may be safe.

I wonder if that card works on credit? I'm good with credit.

8.27.2008

The Dude Abides

Lebowski article in Rolling Stone

How Important Is Income Inequality?

Apparently VERY important.

Analysis of the Summer Songs of 2008

His final choice for "Summer Song of 2008" is Adam's favorite...

Be Champions!

Jose Mourinho, aka The Special One, the new coach of Inter Milan is back with his puppet show "I'm on Setanta Sports" for a new season. I only saw a few episodes last season, but it's pretty funny. It features regulars Jose, formerly of England and now Mexico boss Sven Goran-Eriksson, Wayne Rooney, and some other callers from around the Premiere League. Episodes can be found on the YouTubes.

Should people really blog about anything?

Kind of creepy...

Why Don't I Make More Money?

Interesting article in the Washington Post on the distribution of income over the past 35 years and the implications of McCain/Obama tax plans.

8.25.2008

Warning: Rant Ahead

So, if I hear one more Hillary supporter say, "I can't in good conscience vote for Barack Obama," I might finally give up all hope in this thing called "democracy." I say this with the utmost respect. I admire commitment like that. I get it when people say that she's experienced and would make a good leader. Hell, I'm not even that much more partial to Obama--if Hillary were on the ticket, I'd punch her chad. But, one thing's for certain: I'm certainly not going to vote for McCain (or not vote at all) simply because my pick didn't get the nomination. I say this for two reasons:

First, the results up to this point are the product of competition. The DNC sets up the rules, and we all (presumably) abide by them because we don't raise objection (unless its months too late and you live in Florida). Then, the competition is played out and the winner gets the prize. We don't teach our children, when they lose the state soccer tournament, to lay in the middle of the field, scream their own name, wear shirts that say "We'll win next year!" and/or call in favors from their best friends to see if they can get the ruling on the field overturned. No. We teach how to lose with some dignity and how to keep our heads up when we congratuiate the winner. This is, in fact, what Hillary has done; but, her supporters just don't seem to get it. (By the way, I'll be the first to admit that I think the DNC and RNC rules are outdated and illogical, and that the whole two-party system is ruining politics as we know it; yet, that does not mean that we can just throw out the rules when it suits our needs.) I'm proud to see Hillary where she is today. I was proud to see her in the campaign. I'm also proud to see her bow out gracefully and allow the winner to accept the nomination.

Second, a question: Is there really much difference between these two? This is why I say above that I don't really care who is on the democratic ticket; either one suits my needs. I mean, come on. They could barely find things to disagree on in their debates. They had to make personal attacks to keep the damn thing interesting. When it comes down to it they're both politicians. Neither one is the savior that we need for the next eight years. They're politicians, plain and simple. If we wanted change we should have worked harder to nominate Kucinich or Ron Paul. They were change candidates. What we have here on the democratic ticket is a tinkerer (just like Hillary would have been)*. Tinkerers are not bad at all. We definitely have good things to look forward to if the Democrats are successful in November. But, they are not saviors and they are not change agents. They're politicians. The one thing they have going for them is that they are not Bush or McCain. That should be enough (for either).

Please, please, please, stop bringing up issues of conscience when speaking about how you are so torn during this election season. For all that is holy, drop the grudge, lose with dignity and support the best of the two candidates (unless, of course, you really have legitmate reasons for chosing a third party candidate--I'm for that). The problem is not that someone wants to exercise his freedom and independence to vote for who he wants, it's the fact that he will throw away the privilege just to make a display in the center of the field.

Am I wrong? Or just an asshole?

*I heard Ron Paul say this in some interview, and I liked it a lot.

Dumbest Sentence I've Read In A Long Time

In an article from the LA Times regarding a new gym generating its own power:
Boesel doesn't know how much energy the solar arrays and human-powered equipment will produce, but he expects his fitness center to use about half the energy of most gyms its size by providing as much as 40% of its energy needs.
Did I miss something in that sentence?  How do they use half (a.k.a. 50%) of the energy of similarly sized gyms by only providing 40% of their energy needs?!?!

"Some are built so the front doesn't fall off!"

I don't know if this a hoax or not, but it is absolutely one of the funniest things I've seen.  What would be considered a "cardboard derivative?"